Dream On...

For some reason there seems to be pretty limited encouragement these days to talk about your actual deep down dreams, perhaps because we are expected to strive for a conventional career in order to pay bills and fulfil the usual 9-5. Despite this being the ideal or the reality for some, I wanted to throw my thoughts into the mix. I've never been one to have insanely high aspirations before, I wouldn't say I had a talent nor a specific life-strategy to attain any particular career, and have only recently started visualising a bucket list. Besides these few notes in my head, I am completely clueless. For any of you in this boat of un-known-ness with me, or if you're the opposite and have a big career established or your own crazy journey planned, I'd love to hear about them. We must spread positivity and encouragement, letting serve this as a reminder for us to strive more towards what we want in life to help us feel happy and content. If we don't achieve an ounce of this, or if we never even try to follow what feels right, would we actually be happy - say in 10 years time looking back? Or would we feel regret? By putting this post out there I'm hoping to push you to strive for what you want, rather than having future you feel the dreaded 'what if', were you to never pursue whatever it is you love or daydream about doing. How crazy is it to think that we (even the most organised among us) have absolutely zero notion of where we will be or what exactly we will be doing in 5 or 10 years time? This notion alone would mean it makes complete sense to work towards fulfilling your dreams each and every day.

To zoom in on my current position, a whopping 14 years of school has now ended and 99% of my year group are heading off to university. I like the idea of university and was set on going throughout the whole of secondary school, but just as I was supposedly 'ready' to go I felt the complete opposite. I still couldn't tell you which course I would apply for. All I was set on was studying in London, a pretty useless factor without a subject or campus in mind. Avoiding the path most taken was not part of my plan, which makes the decision to hold out for a year (or more, who knows) one big concoction of scary and exciting emotions. My gap year is technically starting and in the free time available to me now, I thought it would be fitting to document a couple of things I want to do or achieve/attempt within my life, in the hope that you guys would share the same. Not necessarily all to accomplish in this coming year, but in general bucket-list fashion.

• Live in a teeny apartment in New York, just for a little while
• Road trip across vast ol' America
• Take a snowboarding holiday, and actually push myself to improve day by day
• Pass a driving test and save for a first car (Inbetweeners style cinqicento here I come)
• And the big one, put more energy into CloudEsmé because I loove it and the little community we have here (also looking into giving it a makeover/export to wordpress by the end of the year..)

So there's a few snippets; I'm hoping they're pretty realistic, and can't wait to come back to this in a few years time to see what's unveiled in between. I'd really enjoy hearing some of your guys' dreams and want to say to any of you who worry over the future (like I do) to transfer some of the panic into excitement instead. As Baz Luhrmann once said, "Worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing Bubble gum". Wise words. Ultimately, everything happens for a reason; life is short, so dedicate time towards making your visions a reality, and aim to spend your time doing what you want to deep down. And if 'ultimate dream #1' doesn't work out as you planned, remember there is always something around the corner. It'll work out. Have a lil' faith :) Your happiness is your priority, so don't keep postponing these ambitions and certainly do not let anybody else discourage you from them.

Update - A few weeks after writing this (it's been in my drafts for a while) I watched Cartia Mallan and Emma Mercury's #TheMessyEffect video and got really pumped to start ticking off this list and fulfilling (currently distant) dreams. If you haven't watched it, what are you waiting for! Check it out!